Friday, May 15, 2009

Of Horse Hair Wigged Judges And Dumb Law Suits.

We’ve heard about our judiciary mostly in the light of grand corruption and botched up radical surgeries but have you ever thought of the complete and utter comedy that the courtrooms must be at times?


Everyone has a right to seek legal redress on any issue that they deem provable but I can’t for the life of me imagine how the judges resist the temptation to smack someone in the face when they bring what can only be described as dumb lawsuits to court.


I sometimes wonder how our horse hair wigged friends manage to keep a straight face when listening to, and judging cases of full grown men accused of having carnal knowledge of hapless chickens and sheep. And such other bizarre cases.


Speaking of horse hair wigs, (insignificant piece of crap if you ask Kenya’s Dopest Chick), why oh why are our judges are still wearing costumes that carry with them years of ancient British traditions, customs and laws, some of which were dictated by extreme cold winters none of which we have here? I appreciate the temptation to have some sort of distinguishing regalia for the judges but can’t we have a more relevant hallmark for the bar? Does wearing a normal business suit or our Kenyan dress hinder then from delivering good judgment?


From The Web: Judges of the world.


From The Past: Intersexual In Kamiti

23 Comments:

willpress said...

Many a time i have asked myself the same question. Those wigs ( i hear they cost around 30 something thousand) make some judges look a tad bit outrageous. Unecessary remnants of British rule, with little application in the African context, just like long summer holidays. . .

Comedy also comes from the Bench itself. I was at the Court of Appeal last year before a three judge panel of Lord Justices O'kubasu, Aganyanya and former Lady Justice Awuor. The punchlines they served made Vioja Mahakamani sound sane. One lawyer was like, " My Lords, I'm very sure that u are aware that the law is ass!" O' Kubasu replied without a shred of emotion, "But you yourself must try not to be an ass, Counsel."lmfao!

Shiko-Msa said...

Who if not Willpress. He of the Shadoofing fame. Sijasahau. Long time. Lol @ Long summer holidays. Chai ya saa kumi also came from the same Britons I think?

The said judges look very severe with the exception of the Lady Justice. I hope I'm not biased. How do you train someone to be emotionless?

willpress said...

Hey hey shiko :-) glad am still somewhere in your mind. . .pleasant surprise :-)

Yah, even 4pm tea reeks of British mannerisms. Haja gani ya chai yet mama watoto is whippin up sum huge ugali lol?

Hmm, I dont know what they do to soberize these judges. . . I guess its the stacks n stacks of case files and books that crushes their funnybone . . And the fact that their conduct must always be free from reproach. Yani mpaka heading down to the bar for a few pints is a pipe dream. That must reeeaaally suck!

Shiko-Msa said...

And the said ugali is probably eaten at 2 or 3.

Of course you're still somewhere on my mind. Do blush. hehehehe. Anyway I don't forget bloggers.

Stacks of paperwork are enough to depress even the most lively of us. And yet those for the judiciary cannot even be called stacks. Those are something else. Stuff like what Brother Paul Kamlesh Patni ferried to court in a pick-up?

Eunuch said...

Ciku,
The judges are only the symptom of a country chocking in colonial relic. Shwo me any institution that has been Kenyanized and I will show you KACC and all its warts.

Start from education and see the mess that 8-4-4 (=0?, no pun). Moi borrowed a very good education system working perfectly well in Canada but istead the prof politicized its implementation now see the mess. Can you imagine such an abstract subject like Art and Music being taught usefully to a primo kid?

Now do you know our judges still have SUMMER BREAK when they congrate in Msa and all High/Appeal court business stands still for that whole duration?

Add to that MY LORDS crap (vatican would expell me for blasphemy). Even in her HM's courtrooms that balderdash has been replaced with YOU HONOUR. A

In a nutshell we are only independent on paper. Our cheap politics gives no room for real policies and implementation. And those who try are better advised Kenya iko na wenyewe. It all boils down to lack of institutions that don't match the times. What a thesis LOLL?

Shiko-Msa said...

Yeah Eunuch that My Lords business is another one.What lords!

Tamaku said...

Shiko-Msa,

Dad was in the judiciary for many years, he told me these lawyers go out of their way to impress who's the Britishest of them all! Non more British than that defence counsel, have you heard him speak? He'll take it as a compliment, lol!!

PKW said...

I'm just L'ingOL over here

Mama said...

There's no such thing as a dumb law suit Wanjiku, that is how lawyers put their food on the table :-)

joyunspeakable said...

hehehe shiko...i was left in stitches on the judge head gear and summer holiday.......the meru have a court called njuri cheke...maybe kenyans should borrow from that system and put a kenyan face to it....

kachwanya said...

I guess we are tied down with Colonial baggage forever. The politicians are forever fighting and so don't expect any change soon. Good ones are voted out coz they don't conform to our turn to eat measurement. Take example of Joe Donde, Prof. Wangari Mathae.

If anything i would like to see MPs signing performance contract to avoid being cheated every electoral cycle. Only then will we get the right people, serious enough to change things around. But again out there the good people are afraid to make their hands dirty in the mud filled politics. So unless God save us from this sit down and jienjoy My Lords

Shiko-Msa said...

Tamaku, that Britishisity reminds me some stories I’ve heard about the former AG and Duke of Kabeteshire.

Lol PKW. The collection of minds on blogosphere makes me lol too many a times.

Mama there goes the full name. I told you when I've been a bad girl my mum used to call me by full name as opposed to pet name. Sternly. The last time I was referred to by full name was at yours by Our Kid. Seems I've become a bad bad girl of late hehehehe. Ni kubaya.

Kachwaya add to that Njoki Ndung'u and PLO Lumumba. They do not seem cut out for competitive politics running around, giving nonsense speeches at rallies and slinging mud at opponents. But I think they are brilliant legislator all the same. As so are many others whose leadership skills are going to waste just because they can’t make noise. Sucks big time.

Joyunspeakable traditional courts would do so much to ease the current quagmire that our legal system has become. They're the ones that could be sorting out the whole man-chicken-sheep-conjugal and such like issues to ease congestion in mainstream courts. My 2 cents worth. Look at Gacaca and what they've done for the Rwandese.

Eunuch BTW I didn't know we borrowed the 8-4-4 system from Canada. In Primo we built a traditional hut, a folding chair, stools, some musical instrument, tin structures and many more - all in the name of I think Art and Craft it was. It’s like we were being trained to be girly girl artisans or something. It was interesting simply because it broke the monotony of sitting in class lakini I don’t think it helped any of us.

extravagantgrace said...

Shiko, ha ha ha ha ha well some traditions go way back and it would be like moving mountains to ask for change besides The Lords are pretty much set in their ways. I have to wear a gown but its optional here if we wear a wig or not but am not a Lord just one of the learned friends. Then we have the silks who wear silk gowns as a mark of distinction for the yrs in practice. It can be pretty uncomfortable in summer but hey comes with the job.

The language used is just to confuse the lay man the Lord business is a sign of respect for the governing law and the yrs spent in studies just like we have doctors

ruthleen said...

SAsa and thanx for stopping by,yaani umenichekesha,sometimes those wigs appear so white than the person in it ,what a camouflage,tka care

Shiko-Msa said...

Ruthleen kwanza on black skin! eish

Extravagantgrace thanks for that education. Interesting. Somehow I don't find the gowns as hideous as the wigs. Lol.

Maua said...

Mhhhhhhhhhhh

Shiko-Msa said...

Maua I take that as total agreement. As in you also wonder what the heck our judges wear wigs for. I hope I'm right. Lol.

Mama Shujaa said...

Either there was a stash of money tucked under one wig (READ: shackle), or the residual colo-mentality Britishitty leaked thru the horse-hair and resulted in the recent 8-month sentence delivered to Lord Cholmondeleya.

pink m said...

I keep wondering, those wigs don't itch?
The one time I had a weave (sijui human hair), I itched so much, I had to have it removed, so I wonder...

Shiko-Msa said...

Lol Mama Shujaa I can see where you're coming from with the cholmmoooddeoool... (Never quite got his name right ever). And don't forget during those months he'll be kept most comfortable.

Miss Pink kwanza like in hot areas surely. And the wigs are said to be very expensive.

I too the only time I ever tried a that human hair I had it removed the next day. and the way it had cost me a pretty penny. The stylist thought I was crazy. God forbid if you have a weave and you're gyming and the head sweats today, tomorrow, the day after........

savvy said...

I thought the practice of wearing wigs started way back when the British used to wear them as distnguished gentlemen, powdered to perfection.

Even our parliament has a dress code that forbids women from wearing trousers...that is something am sure the British changed even before we got independence.

The comments have been funny..ati four o'clock tea when you've just had ugali at 2 and are waiting for the next mountain at 7pm!

Shiko-Msa said...

Savvy and there was also the no handbags in the house thing. And Koigi can attest to the no african attire in the house rule.

Maua said...

Mhhhh, as in 'r u serious?'